Two roads diverged in a wood and I – I took the one less traveled by, and that has made all the difference.
~ Robert Frost
A few short months after we returned from Hungary, we entered an entirely new community. It was a beautiful community, but still, a new community.
The waters needed to be tested. Our leaders were calling it a safe place and there was nothing to do but trust. But my reality remained. I was just barely holding my head above water in my struggle with bipolar disorder.
As I sat at my first Life Group meeting I recognized, yet again, the uncomfortable feeling. And I was ready to admit it was a holy uncomfortable feeling.
Would I enter the sacred ground of my own vulnerability? Or would I shy away, remaining hidden in the shame of mental illness?
Those two paths diverged in the wood of my rough-terrain of forest. I knew there was only one choice. So I tentatively, and yet with growing confidence, began to share the story of the mental illness which had radically altered my and my family’s life.
###
And as I continue to choose the ‘less traveled‘ path, I find vulnerability is truly a discipline. It is one practiced over and over again in the Bible. From Job to Solomon, Moses to Elijah, Kings David to Hezekiah, Miriam to the Mary’s who walked with the Savior, the Apostles Peter to Paul, and ultimately in Jesus, we see a weeping people, hearts in open grief, bearing all before God and others.
Why is vulnerability a discipline?
Because it is necessary for our intimacy with others and ultimately with God. He does not want a people out of touch with their pain. He invites us into His heart which aches with all that is this fallen world.
And He invites us into His heart for us. He is close to the brokenhearted and those that are poor in spirit. It is here, in our vulnerability, where we express our nakedness, full of need, for God, and God alone.
But you might say, ‘Why does that mean I need to be vulnerable with others, too?’
I have much compassion for this. So much. And therefore gently I say this is often where the discipline of vulnerability truly becomes a part of your devotional life.
As we share with others, we test our vulnerability and the truth of God’s unconditional love. We release our desire to be seen as having it all together and impressing others. We say ‘no’ to this and ‘yes’ to the sufficiency of Christ to be our righteousness.
As a caveat, I do know that not everyone is safe. But in the right places, you will find some who are. It’s about taking that next step toward a life of vulnerability not about bearing your deepest pain to the world (at least that’s not your next step ;).
In the end, there really are two paths for each of us. And it really does seem like that one less traveled is very unsure. Each step takes an incredible amount of trust. But, the sun filters beautifully through the trees. There is both warmth and refreshing coolness.
And in the end, we increasingly feel what will forever be our embrace in the arms of God.
